My Personal Roller Coaster: Learning to Love Myself

As I sit to write, I struggle.  My head is full of words and ideas, but sorting them is a chore.  Could this be why I'm tired all the time?  Focusing on one thought is difficult.  Ideas pulse in my brain.  This is one reason I stopped writing to begin with.  The motivation to write was over powered by the jumble in my head.  My eyes are constantly darting around the room.  Sometimes I look at the computer, sometimes at the dogs, but never in one place for very long.  All I want is a clear thought.  Instead I have 20 messy ones: Girl scouts, Christmas, pick up my kid, what to cook for dinner, just to name a few.  Focus, focus.....I simple can't . This is what it's like for me every day.  It's become worse that past few months.  When I'm home, I just want to sit and watch TV.  It's the only time my mind is somewhat focused on something.  Usually two things because I can't just sit and watch TV.  I also f...

Where do I begin?  How do I begin?  Why am I here.  Well, I guess I should start with that.   I have depression, anxiety, and ADHD.  My husband has high functioning ASD (and probably a few other disorders) and my son, who is currently 11 has ODD (oppositional defiance disorder), ADHD, and high functioning ASD.  My oldest daughter, currently 15, has PTSD, depression, and juvenile psoriatic arthritis.  My youngest, currently 6, is still to be determined.  I pray she's the normal one.  Normal being used loosely, as she's extremely articulate and well spoken for a 6 year old, strong-willed, and has a curiosity that could rival any cat.  When I say normal, I'd like to see her be disorder free.   Why am I here?  As you can imagine, my life is a constant of ups and downs.  I know this is the same for everyone, but it seems lately, my downs are lingering.  I have very little motivation beyond getting up and t...